It was my second year as a student at a private university in Kabul. In the family, my father was the sole breadwinner of the family, who worked as a shopkeeper to support the family financially.
This depended on being able to sell something or not, sometimes he was able to sell well, enabling him to bring better things for home and sometimes works were not going well whereas we had to tolerate.
Sometimes I wasn’t able to pay well for my education due to my father’s low income which led me to look for a part-time job. So I searched for job and sent job application wherever I saw job announcement, this ended up result less. Sometimes I even thought to myself that in a country where many Bachelor and Master Degree holders are unemployed, how can I get a job. This made me more disappointed, but I still had no choice but to hope and try to find a job because I was not in a position to sit down and be only spectator of the situation.
I explored job-search websites and applied for every vacant position which was in line with my ability, but after several days and repeated attempts, I lost hope and did not receive a response to any of my requests and decided to stop trying and stop the process of my education where it was. Overtime, I convinced myself that there is no job for me and I have no income to pay for my education.
But suddenly, in the same days of despair, I received a call asking for my service. In this call, they offered me a job that was in accordance with my circumstances. I was in a situation that hearing a job offer was one of the best news I could hear. The news was so pleasing to me that I did not even think about any of the working conditions and environments in which I was going to work, and only responded positively to the job offer because I saw it as the only way to achieve my dreams. I started working with full satisfaction. There was a printing press where my job was as an online marketer enabling me to work from anywhere at any time.
At first, I did not do my work through an in-person method, but over time, my employer asked me to come to the office after university. Even after a while, during the time I left university he would come behind the university gate to pick me up and bring me to the office. I was not familiar with any of the employees in the office, especially with those whose work department was separate from mine. Most of those who were partner with me did not work in an in-person method.
Gradually, the employer started talking to me. I considered it a kind of entry into my personal life; he even sometimes asked some questions about my personal life and my life situation. I answered because I was afraid of losing my job. He used to travel to Pakistan once or twice a month for working affairs. When he was not in the country, I felt more relaxed because I felt uncomfortable with his presence but I could not express. After two or three months of work, I was annoyed that the employer was trying to get closer to me day by day. I tried to stay away from him and reduce my presence.
One day, in the last days of my working month, he asked me to come to his office for receiving my salary. I went to his office because I needed money.
I did not feel secure in his office because no one was present except me and him. I felt like something was going to happen, I asked to receive my salary as soon as possible and get out but!!! The employer openly asked me to sit next to him for a few moments and talk.
I told him explicitly that I did not have time and that he should give me my salary as soon as possible so that I could leave but I faced a harsh tone from the employer that threatened me saying: “There is no salary unless you sit with me for a few moments.” I was shocked to hear this sentence. Fear took over my whole body. I did not see the ability in me to face him.
Nevertheless, I tried to get out as soon as possible saying I have works to do elsewhere but he insisted on his own words and began to ask personal questions. He said, “I know you have a lot of financial problems, I will help you solve all your problems.” I was so scared that I could not think of anything else but to get out of this place. My only effort was to find a way out.
I cried and begged him to give up on his words and demands but he did not pay attention to my tears and insisted on his demands. Finally, I used all my energy and strength to escape to the door which I succeed and because of escaping from there, I was not able to get my salary. I never thought I would see such a day in my life or face such a scene because of my work but the game of the destiny is such that it always depicts scenes that you do not believe in.
That scene caused me to suffer severe emotional trauma. I even lost the ability to attend my classes and even lose concentration at home. As soon as I was alone, the horrible scenes of facing the employer were visualized before my eyes, misery and helplessness took root in my whole body.
This situation continued to such an extent that I left university because I no longer had the motivation to pursue my studies. Sometimes I thought to myself that even if I finish my education, I would still have to work for someone in somewhere. There was no guarantee that I would be treated the same.
I chose to stay at home so that I would not at least harm myself. The feeling that cannot be separated from me is the feeling of hatred for men, who turn to use girls and women and misuses their poverty and economic conditions to be happy for a moment,
This annoys me very much!